I like Will. He’s sassy
about to watch Hannibal while eating dinner… this should be fun
don’t fuck with me like this we all know this shit isn’t going to be rationed unless you’re on a deserted fucking island what the fuck skittles are you trying me because I’ll pour your bag of assorted rainbow oval candies down my throat quicker than you can apologize for your sorry ass packaging damn skittles got me all fired up this isn’t what I pay taxes for so don’t fucking joke around about things like this skittles
Odin and Loki on Jane.
Isn’t it interesting that Odin says, in effect, “don’t attach yourself to humans because their mortality makes them unworthy” while Loki says “don’t attach yourself to humans because their mortality will cause you pain”.
In the 7th grade I had a class where we took a personality test and then we were separated into groups based on our results and my group was just me and two girls and our personality type was described as “mystical” and then one of the girls got expelled for huffing Axe in the bathroom and the other dropped out of high school and disappeared off the face of the Earth.
"this baby came out of you but im not 100% sure its yours"
Funny thing - a woman who applied for welfare after her husband left her hadto supply DNA evidence he was actually the father. The results: he was definitely the father, but she wasn’t the mother. Her children were removed from her custody and she was sued for fraud, even though she insisted they were her children.
Turns out, she wasn’t a surrogate or a kidnapper (the two most obvious explanations) - she was a chimera. As an embryo, she fused at a very early stage with her twin, forming one individual. Her ovaries apparently developed from cells that had originally belonged to her vanished twin. Later on more tests showed that while the woman’s skin and hair DNA did not match her childrens, DNA taken from her cervix did.
WHAT THE FUCk
This went from stupid to really interesting in point 5 seconds.
- Person: I hate musicals
- Person: They're so gay
- Cop: Can you tell me what happened?
- Me: He ran into my knife.
- Me: He ran into my knife ten times.
- Ensemble out of nowhere: HE HAD IT COMIN'